this is my night for whinging, apparently
Sep. 21st, 2011 10:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mmegaeraI have a problem, and I don't know how to solve it. I have this quilt...
It's a log cabin quilt, in Christmas fabrics. I've been working on it, off and on, for the last couple of years.
Well, it's about 1/3 hand quilted now, which is where it was last June after Morgan died (so I've already set it aside for a while, which hasn't helped), and I have come to the conclusion that the only way I'm ever going to finish this quilt is if I basically force myself to. This is not my idea of enjoying my hobby.
The problem is that every time I work on it, it reminds me of Morgan and Linnet, and my sad times earlier this year. I just don't want to look at it anymore, and I suspect I never will.
But what do I do with it? It represents well over $100 in materials and several hundred hours so I don't want to just chuck it, it's stuck at a point of construction that isn't easily finished (I'm not going to try to machine quilt the rest of it -- I hate wrestling elephants through keyholes), and giving it away in its current state is not going to happen (not even to charity, frankly). But it's just sitting there. The piecing also turned out more than a bit wonky, which didn't bother me if I was going to finish it myself, but means that I wouldn't be comfortable giving it to someone else to finish, either.
I could just pack it away. But the point is not that it's not finished, it's the fact that a) I can't look it in the eye, but b) just packing it away isn't going to make it quit hanging over my head on a psychological level so that I can go onto other things.
It's preying on me. I can't seem to get past it. I just want it to go away. Any ideas besides variations on the ones I've already eliminated? (I listed them all so that you know what I've already considered and rejected doing, to save time)
It's a log cabin quilt, in Christmas fabrics. I've been working on it, off and on, for the last couple of years.
Well, it's about 1/3 hand quilted now, which is where it was last June after Morgan died (so I've already set it aside for a while, which hasn't helped), and I have come to the conclusion that the only way I'm ever going to finish this quilt is if I basically force myself to. This is not my idea of enjoying my hobby.
The problem is that every time I work on it, it reminds me of Morgan and Linnet, and my sad times earlier this year. I just don't want to look at it anymore, and I suspect I never will.
But what do I do with it? It represents well over $100 in materials and several hundred hours so I don't want to just chuck it, it's stuck at a point of construction that isn't easily finished (I'm not going to try to machine quilt the rest of it -- I hate wrestling elephants through keyholes), and giving it away in its current state is not going to happen (not even to charity, frankly). But it's just sitting there. The piecing also turned out more than a bit wonky, which didn't bother me if I was going to finish it myself, but means that I wouldn't be comfortable giving it to someone else to finish, either.
I could just pack it away. But the point is not that it's not finished, it's the fact that a) I can't look it in the eye, but b) just packing it away isn't going to make it quit hanging over my head on a psychological level so that I can go onto other things.
It's preying on me. I can't seem to get past it. I just want it to go away. Any ideas besides variations on the ones I've already eliminated? (I listed them all so that you know what I've already considered and rejected doing, to save time)
