iraunink, I'm afraid I'm going to have to hug your husband (albeit from a safe distance, since you're in Minnesota and I'm near Seattle). I hope you don't mind.
sraun found me a simple way to fix the tab from hell! It's here:
http://www.extendoffice.com/documents/word/903-word-show-hide-tab-characters.html#a1 Following these instructions makes the tabs deletable!!!
I am so happy I could pop. Thank you, Scott!