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it's not fear
Feb. 1st, 2014 01:14 pmIt's a whole lot more than that. I had to get up in front of people at a museum meeting this morning.
And at least it's over. It went exactly as it always does, unfortunately, starting last night with the inevitable physiological fight or flight thing, which means I didn't get any sleep, then it got progressively worse up to the speech itself, and now it's gradually winding down, which will take a day or so more. My hands are still shaking, and it's been over an hour since I spoke for less than a minute. It will be at least another hour before they stop, and another couple of hours after that until they quit being clammy. And that's just my hands. There's also my stomach and my head and...
It's been that way all my life. I got a C in the public speaking class I was forced to take in college as part of my general ed requirement, and I only got that because the teacher took pity on me and saw how hard I was trying [sigh].
I would love to be able to learn how to deal with public speaking, because it really would be a good tool to have. But until there's some way to force my body to understand that standing in front of people and talking /= standing in front of a firing squad, I don't see how.
I'm disabling comments on this post, because the absolutely positively worst possible thing anyone could do right now is tell me what works for them. Thanks.
And at least it's over. It went exactly as it always does, unfortunately, starting last night with the inevitable physiological fight or flight thing, which means I didn't get any sleep, then it got progressively worse up to the speech itself, and now it's gradually winding down, which will take a day or so more. My hands are still shaking, and it's been over an hour since I spoke for less than a minute. It will be at least another hour before they stop, and another couple of hours after that until they quit being clammy. And that's just my hands. There's also my stomach and my head and...
It's been that way all my life. I got a C in the public speaking class I was forced to take in college as part of my general ed requirement, and I only got that because the teacher took pity on me and saw how hard I was trying [sigh].
I would love to be able to learn how to deal with public speaking, because it really would be a good tool to have. But until there's some way to force my body to understand that standing in front of people and talking /= standing in front of a firing squad, I don't see how.
I'm disabling comments on this post, because the absolutely positively worst possible thing anyone could do right now is tell me what works for them. Thanks.
