*this* is the quote that kept running through my head

Aral and Miles in the honor vs. reputation talk in A Civil Campaign (paperback, pp. 386-387):

"I wouldn't have called it a lecture. Just a useful distinction to clarify thought." [Aral] spread his hand, palm up, in a gesture of balance. "Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself."
"Hm."
"The friction tends to arise when the two are not the same. In the matter of Vorsoisson's death, how do you stand with yourself?"
How does he strike to the center in one cut like that? "I'm not sure. Do impure thoughts count?"
"No," said the Count firmly. "Only acts of will."
"What about acts of ineptitude?"
"A gray area, and don't tell me you haven't lived in that twilight before."
"Most of my life, sir. Not that I haven't leaped up into the blinding light of competence now and then. It's sustaining the altitude that defeats me."

Of course Cordelia's son is going to feel this way. That's what all the quoters of Cordelia on great things coming from imperfect people aren't taking into account [g].

Anyway. I have got to shut up on this subject now...